Homesick?

So what is homesickness? I ask this question because it has come up in our expat discussion group (a bunch of drunks in the pub) and in one to one counselling situations (a cup of coffee at the cafe). I have come to the conclusion that it means different things to different people. From my point of view I have not felt any desire to return to the UK and I miss nothing. It is easy to have a nostalgic view of the UK, I have had some fantastic times with some great friends, but those days ended long before I came out here. In fact those days ended when Georgia was born. From being involved in our local bike club in a big way with great friends, we have a kid and become instant lepers. It is a fact of life that you only have friends for that period of time when you all share the same interests. So for me the break from close friendships was already made. Our lifestyle of weekend bike rallies and European trips was also at an end. We had become Mum and Dad and with that new responsibilities. It is hard to put away your childish ways, but a fundamental change takes place within your Psyche when you become a dad, and the desire to party loses its appeal. I enjoy being a dad and do the best I can. Georgia has seen things and done things in her 11 years of life that I would only have dreamed about at her age, and I know for certain that life for her in NZ is, and will be better than the UK. So if I ever think back to those wild exciting days and whimper, all I have to do is look at Georgia and the "dad thing" overrides all else. So for me homesickness is illusory, it is nostalgia for a time in my life that had had its day anyway. Having said that when things are hard it is easy to look back at those happy times and wish you were there.
So that is my angle, but for other people it seems quite different. Here are few of the points that people have made as they define what homesickness means to them. No family and friends support structure is there for you to moan to, to entertain you when you feel bored and unmotivated. Those places that you felt comfortable in, are gone. The familiar things from sports teams to Favourite TV programs, all different. The more stressed you feel the more importance you give to these things, and there is no doubt that starting a new life here is full of stress, and there are no happy memories (but happy times)here to give you comfort (when you look back in a few years time, you will see happy memories, but for now your mind will drag you back to the UK).
I feel life here is like a jigsaw, all the pieces are here, but they don't all quite fit yet. But what I do feel, is that you need to understand that you are a pioneer in a new country, you are starting a new family line, it is time to let go of the apron strings and to come to the fore as a truly independent person, with this realisation you will grow strong and confident and look forward not backward. (It's still alright to miss your mum though).